Every path away from compulsory schooling into and through the wilderness of homeschooling is unique and previously uncharted.

Not only is every family's path different from every other family's, every individual takes a somewhat different way than every other individual inside every family. This kid went over to investigate that huge tree, the older one liked climbing that rock, one parent is trying to create a healthy meal while they walk and another parent is wrangling the toddler,  while the teen is walking mostly parallel to them with a group of other teens and older kids from other families, barely in sight, though definitely not lost.

Given that truth, one may wonder how any other person can help anyone else find their way. I have found that, just as every plant and animal and landscape is utterly unique and special yet can be classified and categorized, so too can the individual paths of home education. These paths to and through the wilds of homeschooling, unschooling, and respectful parenting actually cover much of the same ground: meeting, crossing, occasionally running together, and sometimes leading to each other, however, they come from different directions, sprouting from diverse foundational beliefs, and often aiming for seemingly disparate goals. Changing beliefs often change the end goals. I have found about 4 different kinds of paths, and they are defined by those beliefs that set a person or family on a trail in the first place.

Knowing your big why should inform everything you do at home to educate yourself and your family, whether you use schools or not. Indeed, thinking about why you do literally anything is how to keep yourself on the right path for you, so make sure you put at least a little thought into they why behind every decision you make, especially when your decision will affect other people's paths or choices. Running on autopilot is only a good idea if you know for absolutely certain not only where the programmer is taking you, but also that you actually want to end up there.

A bird's eye view of the pathways to and through homeschooling:

In no particular order...

Path 1

Many families choose conscious parenting and homeschooling for the purpose of preparing their children for their futures. These parents believe the world their children will live and work in as adults will be very different from the one our current school systems prepare children for. The goal is to teach their children the skills they will need to succeed in the workplaces and communities of the future. After all, here we are in 2024, and the compulsory school system is still training ALL children to the obedience, competitive nature, and resilience to monotony required for jobs in industrial factories, which haven't employed the majority of Americans since, well, never. This path is economic and workplace centered, with a focus on the future.

Path 2

Many families choose gentle parenting and homeschooling to shelter their children from the dangers of mainstream culture, both widely agreed upon dangers as well as aspects of our culture seen as dangers by those with opposing worldviews and beliefs. These parents believe our world is dangerous and their goal is to do everything they possibly can to ensure their children are strong enough to handle the world and remain strong in their beliefs and values in the face of these dangers. After all, here we are in 2024, and the institutions our children are required by law to attend still and increasingly have serious problems with bullying, violence, and drug use, with no solutions in sight. This path is based in fear, and is often though not always religious, the focus is on strength of character.

Path 3

Many families "choose" homeschooling and connective parenting as a final resort after having survived a failure of the school system, sometimes the aforementioned dangers of institutional schooling, sometimes an inability or refusal of the schools to adequately serve differently abled students. These parents are left with no choice but to try to educate their children as well as they can, and often believe school would be the best choice if a better school was available, and that schools should be able provide the education anyone deserves. The goal is keeping up with the school model, creating the skills their child needs to survive in school or work, and sometimes returning to school. After all, here we are in 2024, and schools are still trying to teach all students the same way and expecting everyone to have the same abilities and behavior as everyone else, students and parents alike. This path is based in conformity, with a focus on just being normal (whatever they believe is normal).

Path 4

Many families choose respectful parenting and homeschooling for the purpose of allowing their children to be who they authentically are, while the parents are also trying to live or find their own truths. These parents believe our culture is inhumane, possibly even anti-human, and often also that our culture is against relationship with anything but money. After all, here we are in 2024, and schools are still indoctrinating our children with the belief that top-down hierarchical power-over relationships are natural to humans, which is only normal in the manufactured environments we have built for the purpose of changing the focus of human lives to generating wealth and holding power, which usually go hand-in-hand. This path is based on discovering what it means to be human, and the goal is to allow our younglings the time and space to recreate our culture to suit actual humans and their natural relationships, with both each other and the rest of nature.

Path 5

I know, at the beginning I said there were about 4 paths.... I also wanted to note, and remind my beloved readers, that EVERYONE HOMESCHOOLS. Many families choose homeschooling to exclude compulsory school, and many families choose to use schools, and every family learns at home. Regardless of whether you choose to use schools or not, whether you choose to require your children to learn academics or not, whether you pursue lots of learning other than academics or focus on schooly things.... what a child learns with their family, outside the academic arena, in their home or out in the real world, is the most important part of education, the most important knowledge they can acquire, and should be treated as such. Children learn more from the modeling of their adults than anyone else, what you do, say, and believe is the foundation of what they will do, say, and believe. Of course, if you use schools this includes the adults they have there, which they may spend a lot more time with than you. Make sure what they are learning at home from you is what you want them to learn. You might have to wrangle some trauma, change some behaviors, and/or learn some new things yourself in order to give them your best, and it can be very difficult to do, but that is your job as a parent. School can make this harder, as you are not the one they spend most of their time with, and school can present opposing ideas about the role of family, and also if you are participating in school you are co-opted into facilitating the school's agenda (coercing your children to do homework, get high grades, obey their teachers and rules, and corrupt their natural sleep and eating and social patterns, participating in school-related consumerism, etc...). Not all parents can overcome the influence of schools in their children's lives. Make sure your kids know who you are and why, make sure they see you stand up to the schools when the school is wrong,  make sure your kids know when the school does something (or asks your kids to do something) you don't believe is good or right and why you believe that, and most of all, make sure your kids know you love them unconditionally- especially do not allow their perception of your love and acceptance to be seem to be conditional upon their performance at school, academics or athletics. It doesn't matter if your love is unconditional if they experience it as conditional. For more on this, read Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn.

All paths to and through homeschooling are valid.

Every path a human takes with good intentions is valid, necessary, and important, and education is no exception. The effort, work, and labor of each path contribute unique pieces to the overall culture of liberty in education we homeschoolers are trying to create and protect. 

What path are you following through the untamed wilds? One of these, or one I haven't identified? Do you need any support on your journey? Beta offerings coming soon!